Midlife and Knowing Better

Desiring midlife clarity so we don't spiral into midlife crisis.

“Midlife doesn’t introduce you to a new you; it forces you to admit who you have been all along.”

― Paul David Tripp, *Lost in the Middle: Midlife and the Grace of God*

Paul David Tripp really understands what we experience during midlife, doesn’t he? As I think about my journey, it hits me that there have been many times when I heard God’s word but didn’t act on it (James 1:23-24).

To be honest, I see who I truly am, and I can imagine my younger self would be pretty surprised by this level of openness.

Now, I want to clarify that I’m not admitting to hypocrisy—that’s a different conversation. I am saying that even though I have learned so much from God’s word, I still find myself being more of a hearer than a doer.

As we strive to grow in our faith, we often soak up a ton of Biblical wisdom from sermons, worship, and Bible studies. It can feel like a lot to take in, especially when so much happens within just one week.

But even in this cycle, we have a wonderful opportunity to awaken our hearts and embrace the journey ahead!

Knowing Better at Midlife

In my 40s, I was reminded of the account of the faithful King Hezekiah found in 2 Kings chapters 18-20. At one point, he became seriously ill, and the prophet Isaiah told him that he would not survive. He fervently prayed for the Lord to heal him, and God responded by granting him 15 more years of life. Inspired by this account, I began to pray, “God, grant me four more decades.”

Yet I realize Paul David Tripp’s statement above rings true, I had to admit some things about where I was in life. That takes an honest look in the mirror. So I took the time to do so. Not so that I could reflect on things that would set me into a crisis. That is what the world does. Instead, I actively was applying the verse that says “Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time because the days are evil.” (see Ephesians 5:15,16)

I desired midlife clarity so I would not spiral into the chaos of a midlife crisis.

But then I read the rest of King Hezekiah’s biography The other account of this event starts in 2 Chronicles 32:24-26(NIV84) which states,

” In those days Hezekiah became ill and was at the point of death. He prayed to the LORD, who answered him and gave him a miraculous sign. But Hezekiah’s heart was proud and he did not respond to the kindness shown him; therefore the LORD’s wrath was on him and on Judah and Jerusalem. Then Hezekiah repented of the pride of his heart, as did the people of Jerusalem; therefore the LORD’s wrath did not come on them during the days of Hezekiah.

But then a telling verse 31 (NIV84) says this:

But when envoys were sent by the rulers of Babylon to ask him about the miraculous sign that had occurred in the land, God left him to test him and to know everything that was in his heart.

The sign of Hezekiah’s miraculous healing had spread through the nations. But many historians and commentators have acknowledged, while not fully doing evil in the sight of the Lord, Hezekiah’s zealousness for the Lord in the last 15 years waned and his character appears to have become self-centered and prideful.

This precautionary account should hit us hard. This shouldn’t be the conduct of older believers who are to steward the graces of God better in their lives. (Read 1 Corinthians 4:1 and 1 Peter 4:10). I’ll dare to say Hezekiah, knew better.

And so do we.

A Decision at Midlife

Our own reflection of mid-life blessings and regrets can be mingled with disappointment that results in despondency. Yet all are mixed with lessons of greater, thankfulness, humility, and submission to God’s Lordship in our lives. These lessons are to fuel our own zeal to love God better and live for his glory over our own. From there these lessons are to be passed on.

When we resolve to lean heavier on the mercies of the cross and enjoy the relationship we have with God the Lord becomes bigger in our lives to brag about and the gospel is sweeter to our souls.

After I made such time of reflection and decisions, something freeing happened.

I found joy in being dependent on Christ, instead of being so independent like my younger self was striving for.

Embracing the essence of our true selves—flaws, vulnerabilities, and all—requires a profound moment of introspection. It’s about recognizing the validity of God’s insight about us through the reflective lens of His Word (again, James 1:23-24). This journey of self-acknowledgment is not about becoming defensive; rather, it is an empowering aspect of living out our Christian faith.

The poor example of Hezekiah’s final years is not what we should strive for. He lived in pride of the accomplishments of youth and cared less about what his actions left behind in the wake of sinning sluggishly (See 2 Kings 20).

God commands us to hold fast to our confession, even while hearing can become dull (See Hebrews 4:14 and 5:11). To those of us who know better God’s says this:

“And we desire each one of you to show the same earnestness to have the full assurance of hope until the end, so that you may not be sluggish, but imitators of those who through faith and patience inherit the promises.” (Hebrews 6:11,12)

So What?

So, what does it really mean when we know what's right but still don’t put it into action in our lives? This brings up some important considerations.

1. Embrace Authenticity: First and foremost, it is essential to acknowledge and embrace your true self today. This means shedding the masks of righteousness or hypocrisy that we often wear. The message of the Cross is one of immense grace and acceptance; it reminds us that no matter where we stand, Jesus is ready and willing to meet us in our authentic state.

2. Take a Stand Against Apathy: Secondly, there is a call to action—to repent and vigorously combat the apathy that can so easily creep into our lives in the years to come. We must remain vigilant and proactive in our spiritual journeys, striving to cultivate a heart that is engaged and responsive rather than complacent.

3. Cultivate Intentionality: Lastly, it is crucial to deliberately slow down our consumption of new information. Instead of rushing to learn more, we should focus on applying the truths we already know but have yet to implement. Take intentional time to meditate on these principles, integrating them into your prayer life. This practice will help you embody these truths with sincerity and authenticity, allowing your faith to grow genuinely in your daily actions.